When you are in a relationship, try hard not to dwell on little things. Everyone has quirks and annoyances. You do too. If you need to get some perspective, think about how you would feel if the person was gone tomorrow. Pause-take a walk alone, spend time with a friend, maybe go on a short trip. And make space for the relationship no matter how busy things feel- one on one time dedicated to connecting emotionally and physically.
There are many wonderful resources to support us in continuous efforts to be a caring partner. The below list is a perfect kit for starting and maintaining a solid, satisfying relationship no matter what the circumstances.
Top 5 Recommended Reads:
How to be an Adult in A Relationship is simply an excellent book on how to clean up your own act in any relationship. It sheds light on how to address your own barriers, blind spots and habits. It lays out extremely helpful charts on typical responses for introverts and extroverts on many life situations, and offers a path to healthier interactions.
7 Habits of a Successful Marriage is a classic book by the Gottmans, world-famous relationship experts who base their guidance on real-life observations in their practice over the past few decades. They are brilliant, insightful people with many practical tips. Look past the word marriage in the title- the book is relevant to any type of core relationship in one’s life. The Gottman books are great resources to pull out over and over to refresh yourself on positive, constructive ways to interact.
Hold Me Tight is an amazing dive into what’s really going on inside of us when we are triggered. Often we have reactions so much bigger than what the moment calls for- driven by our past experiences. This book is a serious tool for gaining awareness and healing that can free you to interact with more clarity and depth.
The 5 Love Languages is a modern classic for good reason. It lays out how we give and receive love in different ways- and being mindful of that is key in understanding how we relate to others. This book is helpful in all life relationships.
Nonviolent Communication is an incredible resource in how to communicate with anyone- especially a partner.